When you realized the guy you once loved was a distant dream. All fuzzy and you aren’t totally sure if what happened was real. And that I could go on hoping and waiting but it wouldn’t change a thing. But that pain, the aching pain is a daily permanent sick son of a bitch in my mind. Everyday. Every single day.
"I know it’s over, I really do. I know it has been for quite some time. It’s over, yet my heart still feels you. You are a memory to me now, but my mind still thinks of you. What we had was finished long ago—yet the words will not stop flowing."
Lullabies by Lang Leav (via parkerquill
Neither could my tear stop flowing.
When you realized hope is a slow writhing blow to your soul, and he is never coming back for you.
I love taking photos in the plane. High up above the sky where everything looks so minuscule and unthreatening.
Hope is a heartless bitch that will eventually unveils itself as the hardest painful slap in your face.
"Sometimes it takes darkness and the sweet confinement of your aloneness to learn anything or anyone that does not bring you alive is too small for you.”
Every now and then, I need a harsh dose of reality to get me back on track. I mop around, I cry and go through the entire mind fucking of self doubt. The journey is mine to take and it will be lonely, but it will be worthwhile.
“One thing I learned a long time ago is that even if you think you’re meant to be with someone, that doesn’t necessarily mean you get to be with them.”
Miranda Kenneally, Catching Jordan
I have learned that the hard way.
It’s like a worst nightmare came true. But it has forces me to look at reality straight in the face and snip that connection, once and for all.
And I will give away everything to bring back the past once more.